What Does It Mean?
Jan242010
I’ve been wandering the house muttering “What does it mean?” stopping only to yell at Sweetness and Light because they’re grounded but they keep coming out of their rooms . . .
Light: There’s a mouse in my room!
FAJ: Sure there is.
Light: No, there is! There is!
Sweetness (coming out of her room): There is. She saw the tail.
FAJ: I don’t care, you’re grounded. Get back in there. It’s not going to scale the bed.
Light: What does scale mean?
FAJ: Climb up the bedpost and smother you in your sleep.
Light: I’m not going back in there.
FAJ: Then sit quietly until your mom is done teaching her class and we can get a cat in there.
Light: Okay.
. . . because I have a twitch in my brain.
The book is done. It’s done, done, done. It goes to copy edit on Monday. But it’s not right yet. I think it’s the sex.
I don’t believe in putting sex in a book so that there’s sex in a book, I believe it has to be an integral part of the story, and the sex in this book is an integral part in that they would have had sex when they have it, and if they have it, I have to show it. I’m good with that part.
Sweetness: Light is on the phone!
FAJ: LIGHT!
Light: I was just talking to Daddy!
FAJ: HANG UP NOW, YOU’RE GROUNDED.
Light: Daddy, I have to go. No, it’s not Mommy, it’s Aunt Jenny. She’s just mean.
FAJ: LIGHT!
Light: I HUNG UP.
But the way I’ve written it not is not right. I don’t know why, but it’s not right. It’s just . . . not right. It’s making me crazy because I can’t analyze it and the book is done, for the love of god, it’s done . . . but it’s not right.
Light: I can’t go back in my room, there’s a mouse in my room!
FAJ: You wanted a gerbil. Same thing. Get in there.
I think it’s because I don’t know what it means. The scene has to mean something besides the sex, show a shift in a character’s perceptions, a change in the plot, it has to have some deep structure. And I don’t know what the sex in Maybe This Time means. Yes, it means they’re rekindling their relationship, but they’ve been doing that for the whole book. It’s not like anybody expected her to say “No.” She’s not stupid.
Light: Sweetness says she doesn’t care if we’re grounded for two weeks! I don’t want to be grounded for two weeks! [Hysterical sobbing.]
FAJ: Then stay away from Sweetness. You bother me again, I’ll ground you for two weeks.
Light: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.
So I have to figure out what the sex means. The book is about connecting, about moving on to new lives, about
Sweetness: LIGHT’S OUT OF HER ROOM AGAIN.
letting go of fear of attachment to others, about
Light: THERE’S A MOUSE IN MY ROOM!
something I can’t quite get. Because basically, sex is not commitment, having sex with your ex is not necessarily starting a new life, it’s just
Light: Sweetness? Want to play Club Penguin?
sex.
Maybe they had sex because there was a mouse in the room. No, that’s not it, either.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.
Filed in Writing
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60 Comments to 'What Does It Mean?'
On January 24, 2010 at 8:15 pm Dee said...
I am very sorry you’re miserable. I am cackling like an old hag, but I’m still very sorry. Thank you for the laugh, though. I needed it.
On January 24, 2010 at 8:36 pm Carol Anne said...
“… I am good with that part.”
Yes, you are good at writing that part. I hope you find the shift character growth or plot change.. the going forward bit. If they have been rekindling their relationship through the whole book, isn’t sex the next step?
But, that was funny and I needed a good laugh even if it was at the expense of your sanity.
On January 24, 2010 at 8:42 pm Lucy said...
Have I told you lately you’re the BEST ROOMMATE EVER?
And it’s only five more weeks of my teaching on the weekends, so… I really need to buy you some chocolate.
On January 24, 2010 at 8:57 pm Jenny said...
Hey, your kids just gave me a blog post.
And lord knows I’ve been whining about the sex in this book for weeks so it’s not their fault. Really.
Although they are real mood killers . . .
On January 24, 2010 at 8:49 pm Louis said...
You are both wonderful.
And aren’t KIDS wonderful.
On January 24, 2010 at 9:12 pm Merry the CB said...
What happens if you take the sex out and they spend the scene trying to figure out whether whacking off the tail of a mouse (with a carving knife) makes it a gerbil?
Seriously, what is missing then from the scene besides the sex?
On January 25, 2010 at 8:54 pm CrankyOtter said...
It makes it a jumping hamster…
On January 24, 2010 at 9:18 pm Lucy said...
Oh. By the way. For those of you wondering… what Light saw was not a real mouse, but the tail of her Littlest Pet Shop mouse. And people wonder why I’m insane…
On January 24, 2010 at 10:04 pm Naked Under My Clothes said...
I maintain it was a natural mistake, after the “flying rodent” incident you experienced.
On January 24, 2010 at 9:19 pm Lora said...
Terrific.
I personally don’t have kids in the house but it is kinda hard to write a sex scene when one’s grandma keeps calling to talk about how long the line was at the grocery store. Sheesh. It’s not like I wanna think about my grandma in the check out lane right at that second. lol
On January 25, 2010 at 1:20 am Micki said...
(-: Better than thinking about your grandma having sex.
Oh, I did not say that. I’m so sorry. No, I’m not — it’s a cheap laugh, but it’s still a laugh (-:. (But I do hope I haven’t offended you — but I don’t hope it enough to actually edit this post. LOL, if it helps, I’ll think about my grandma having sex — ew. Although, she was probably adventurous in her youth.)
On January 25, 2010 at 11:30 am Bethany said...
We came across photos that my grandmom had sent my granddad while he was serving in the navy…no wonder there were six kids really quickly after he returned!
On January 25, 2010 at 3:06 pm Sure thing said...
My grandma had six daughters, yup, she was gettin’ some. Micki – go ahead with the cheap laugh. I laughed!
On January 25, 2010 at 8:50 pm Micki said...
(-: My grandmother had six kids, too!
On January 25, 2010 at 8:57 pm CrankyOtter said...
Youth, nothin. My grandma got remarried at 85. Still remarried and delighted about it at 93. Overshares a bit too much about the joys of vitamin V. My near-teetotaller mom drunk dialed me one night after one such incident. “Can you believe your grandmother…” She was upset but ever since then I think grandma sex is kinda funny.
On January 24, 2010 at 10:02 pm Naked Under My Clothes said...
Is the sex a step backward? Is one of them afraid it is? Is it a way to express that they aren’t the same people as before? Is one of them afraid it will feel too familiar? Does it cause one or both of them to be a little nuts for awhile because it’s too easy to be that person again?
I don’t know your characters but when I contemplated ex sex, those questions were on MY mind, and I’d be wondering about them going into a sex scene in your book.
Contemplated, I said. (As far as you know.)
On January 24, 2010 at 10:23 pm JulieB said...
It’s about accepting themselves. It’s about trust. It’s about honesty. It’s make-up sex that has been brewing for years. It’s an unmasking. It’s about leaving mom. It’s about courages it’s about leg cramps, babies, tantric arts, power, monkey lust, — this _is_ really hard…
On January 25, 2010 at 3:09 pm Sure thing said...
But you’re doing so well!
I especially like “unmasking”
On January 25, 2010 at 10:25 pm JulieB said...
Thanks!
On January 24, 2010 at 10:31 pm Judy Long said...
This is just so damn funny. I really enjoyed that. However, you have my sympathies cause I hate when there is an epiphany on the tip of my tongue / brain & I just can’t get it. Good luck & I hope you get it cause I love the character development & realizations in your books.
OT: I just got notice from amazon that The Cinderella Deal is on the way! Yeah! I haven’t read that one yet.
On January 24, 2010 at 10:52 pm Jenny said...
The sex in that one worked. You’re okay in that one.
Of course I wrote that fifteen years ago.
Maybe it’s me . . .
On January 24, 2010 at 11:21 pm Dee said...
Hmmmm… Maybe it’s about realization/change? Maybe it’s the time when it’s not just about the lust and passion like it had been before, but about the love and caring. Maybe that’s when she finally becomes the absolute center of his focus. Maybe it could be a hinge a-la-Lani. Maybe I’m terrible at this and should just stick to writing fantasy…
On January 24, 2010 at 11:12 pm PG said...
I was puzzled that the sex in Laura Kinsale’s previous book, “Shadowheart” was so controversial, because to me it was totally sex that meant something. It kind of reminded me of the shift in “Charlie All Night” where they go from “we’re having sex because we’re horny and find each other attractive” to “we’re deliberately not having sex to figure out whether there’s more here than sex” to “we figured it out, there’s more, and now sex includes knowledge and awareness of that more.” In Kinsale’s book, the characters’ sex starts angry and violent, and then requires the hero to trust the heroine and let her break him down through what they do sexually, and then once they’ve done all they had to do for their relationship to work, it could be regular Happily Ever After sex.
So my position is, it’s cool if they have sex the first time they meet, or not until the very end (like “Bet Me”), it’s cool if they bite each other or tie each other up and do some erotic flagellation, it just all has to mean something and not be gratuitous. Where I do have to acknowledge a porn-ish aspect to certain romance novels are the ones where the sex doesn’t seem to mean any particular thing; it’s just there because the author sold her book for a particular line that requires a particular level of “hotness” and so she’s going to deliver on that whether it has any significance or not.
On January 25, 2010 at 12:00 am Briana said...
Hmm….Does she cry? I had a guy once that, because of other stuff going on, I cried Every Single Time. For weeks/months, as soon as I got relaxed enough to let go (sex!), I cried — because I wasn’t crying any other time. And it was OK, because he would let it be OK and so it was actually kind of good for me, maybe. But maybe something….something happens in the book kind of like that? Or does something else happen? Like ghosts or kids or holding hands or some weird new position or…something else that makes it clear that this is not *just* sex?
I think that’s the key — that he lets go, or she does, or they hold on, or…something. But I don’t know what.
Hey! I know! Why don’t you send me a copy and I’ll read it and THEN I can help you out? M’kay? How about that?
On January 25, 2010 at 12:02 am Barbara said...
I see The Cinderella Deal is available as an e-book. Dumb question: does anyone know if you can read this on a regular laptop? I don’t have a Kindle, etc…
On January 25, 2010 at 3:14 am toni said...
Barbara, there’s a free Kindle app for your PC. The Mac version is coming soon. [Search for that on Amazon.]
On January 25, 2010 at 12:25 pm Beki said...
Oh you absolutely can! Amazon has a reader you can download!
On January 25, 2010 at 7:28 pm PG said...
There’s also Kindle apps for iTouch/iPhone and possibly other PDAs.
On January 25, 2010 at 12:28 am Skye said...
Y’know, if I’d had a FAJ and a parent like Mommy, I’d have been a bit less hypersensitive (I’ve been called, in great seriousness, both delicate and a hothouse flower … do you know how annoying that is?) and more resilient. But possibly still afraid of mice. I think FAJ is showing great restraint. Unless she has used restraints, which is completely understandable in this situation.
On January 25, 2010 at 1:04 am marly said...
If the fear of attachment and other stumbling blocks are removed, maybe part of it is a mental thing. Rekindled sex could have a few mine fields. Will it be as good as they remember? Better? Hotter? Will all the pieces still fit together the same way? Ah, I wouldn’t actually, personally know about this. It’s all purely speculative, and no one named R. should assume that I do.
On January 25, 2010 at 1:24 am Micki said...
LOL. If I got banter every time I broke confinement, I’d find reasons to break confinement, too! Hee-hee!
No idea on the sex, but glad to hear it’s considered right in the Cinderella Deal (by the world’s toughest judge, yet!). (-: It was just shipped yesteday, yay!
On January 25, 2010 at 1:37 am Bonnie C said...
LOL! I wish to gawd I had an FAJ to ride herd on my Heckle & Jeckle so I could get some damn work done – even muttering about sex. Their tender ears have processed much worse.
S&L are going to be so well adjusted as adults it’s almost scary to think about.
On January 25, 2010 at 1:54 am robena grant said...
Maybe it’s about honesty. Maybe she realizes, through having sex with her ex, that she was more to blame for the divorce than she’d previously imagined. It’s always easy to blame the other person. : ) He loved his work more than her. He didn’t get her. He was a mommy’s boy. And so on, it’s easier than saying I was young and stupid. By reconnecting with him, she sees her part in the break up and admits it to herself, and to him, and that frees her to enter into a more mature love.
On January 25, 2010 at 2:14 am Glynis said...
I just read the whole entry to Beloved Boyfriend–who laughed and laughed. Thank you for the wonderful tale~
On January 25, 2010 at 3:56 am Slave Driver said...
Okay, in Light’s defense, Littlest Pet Shop mouse or not, I’ve seen things I thought were mice tails, and they’ve turned out to be stuff like 1) a grey piece of yarn 2) old cooked spaghetti on the floor the dog missed, 3) a twist tie, and yes I’m old enough to go and rid the room of it myself but it can be startling…
In Jenny’s defense, I know when you’re in the middle of something you just want to yell, “Suck it up and get back in your $*^%!#$@ room NOW!”
On January 25, 2010 at 4:24 am Jenny said...
Okay, it’s better now. (Even Sweetness and Light are asleep at 3AM.) It’s still not up to standard, but it’s pretty good and I can fix in the copy edit, so I zapped it to Jen and now I’m going to bed.
Thank you all for your suggestions. I’ll be using them all in the next book. Which I am starting when I wake up in eight hours. YAY! A new book. The trauma has not yet begun and everything is shiny and new again.
On January 25, 2010 at 8:43 am Lucy said...
Oh. And for what it’s worth, there was a mouse in her last night. The cats woke me up chasing it about 5am. I have paid my karmic toll for doubting Light…
On January 25, 2010 at 10:08 am JulieB said...
Oooh! I _hate_ those moments!
On January 25, 2010 at 12:57 pm JenK said...
“Mo-om! The cat is in the house!Waaaaaaahhhhhh!”
“No it’s not! There is no possible way for the cat to have run in the house! No-one has opened a door in six hours. Go to sleep! Go to sleep! GOOOOOOO…urgh..gah… how the heck did the cat get in the house?”
Yeah. I hate that.
On January 25, 2010 at 9:39 am Laura said...
I’m never sure what I hate more – having the cats chase the mice in the house and knowing they’re around somewhere, or when I get up in the morning to discover that the corpse in the doorway to my bedroom.
On January 25, 2010 at 10:08 am Tracey said...
i love reading about/overhearing other peoples’ conversations with their children and/or fake nieces as I wander through my life, online, in line at the grocery story, at the library, on the metro….Makes me feel so much better when I hurl sarcasm at my two.
On January 25, 2010 at 11:30 am Sierra said...
I totally wanted to make some sort of constructive comment, but my brain got stuck on one thing – I would totally come babysit for free so you guys can work. If it means we get books from you both more often, it would be completely worth it. (I could promise origami bunnies and chocolate chip pancakes, too.)
On January 25, 2010 at 3:14 pm Sure thing said...
If we ever start that Cherry BnB maybe we can make it part of the “Things to do in Ohio” guide that we’ll print up.
On January 25, 2010 at 11:49 am Jennifer said...
Welcome to my life, 24/7.
On January 25, 2010 at 11:55 am Susan D said...
Okay, I think I missed a chapter somewhere… FAJ? The Aunt Jenny part is pretty intuitive (I’m guessing) but F? Favourite? Ferocious? Feverish?
On January 25, 2010 at 7:00 pm Lucy said...
Fake. She’s called Fake Aunt Jenny, but the “fake” is more a joke now. The kids couldn’t love her more if she actually was my sister, and neither could I.
On January 25, 2010 at 12:28 pm Beki said...
Fake Aunt Jenny. And your post clearly exemplifies why parents never get to have enough sex. Good for you for managing the time to make your fictional sex perfect for all of us who can’t wait to read it!
On January 25, 2010 at 1:47 pm TerriO said...
I was trying to think of some helpful input, which unfortunately meant I contemplated sex with my ex, and now I want to hurl. Good thing I skipped lunch.
Happy to hear you figured it out!
On January 25, 2010 at 2:06 pm Brooke said...
“She’s just mean” AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HA HA HA HA HA
On January 25, 2010 at 3:31 pm Melissa Blue said...
Whenever there is a day like this in my house I call my mother and thank her for not smothering me in my sleep. My children together are tame in comparison and I would have totally had it coming.
Sidenote: A true mood killer is the child trying to read the sex scene over your shoulder.
On January 25, 2010 at 3:49 pm Barbara said...
Re what Slave Driver wrote about things that look like something and aren’t…I’ve had things I didn’t think were real and WERE: I thought it was a piece of string on the window blinds in my office. It was a small poisonous snake (the cops in my small town got rid of it and said so) and what I thought was maybe a bee sting turned out to be a black widow on me that bit me (oh, was I sick!). So now I believe it can be something bad BEFORE I go near it. I am very respectful of the small snake in the back yard that is supposed to NOT be the coral snake he looks like just in case.
On January 25, 2010 at 9:46 pm Dee said...
Good God, woman! Where the hell do you live?
On January 26, 2010 at 11:37 am Laura said...
Don’t feel to bad – due an allergy to grass I have on numerous occasions thought the sting in my thigh while weeding was grass poking me when really I had sat on a bee.
On January 25, 2010 at 5:16 pm Kate George said...
Thank you all for making me laugh through the flu, the wind, the rain, and the damn giganitc willow that I love is going to fall and take out the house.
Carry on. I’m counting on you!
On January 25, 2010 at 7:31 pm Lyn said...
Sex. Well, sometimes you know how you come home after a hard day’s dodging work and you go straight for the Hagen Dazs Dasz Ben & Jerry’s? When what you really need is a glass of tea and/or a nap? Sometimes people have sex when what they need to do is to Have a Talk or Get some Exercise or Balance the Budget. Sex is more fun. Are your characters having fun? There should be laughing and thrashing. Something should slosh. Okay. That’s all.
On January 25, 2010 at 8:48 pm CrankyOtter said...
Man, I wish my miserables were expressed as comedically as yours. I, and many people I know, have just been in a horrible, horrible funk for the last couple weeks. It’s getting to where I can see it (whereas before I was in it and unable) and can think “maybe I shouldn’t say this snarky thing” as I’m saying the snarky thing that doesn’t go over well AT ALL at work.
And I’m starting to get why my mom grounded us to the outside.
On January 25, 2010 at 8:52 pm CrankyOtter said...
Maybe instead of grounding, have some fidget burning task…
When my friend’s boy gets squirrely, she times him running around the house (time X), then says “now let’s see if you can do 5 laps in 5X or less”. If it was indoors, we’d use the microwave timer and he’d race to beat the clock. Or if he and the neighbor girl were getting up to something she’d have them “race from me to that tree 10 times and see who wins”. She’d count while they burned calories tumbling over each other. Still worked at age 8 to get him to burn off excess energy. Didn’t ever catch on that it was purely and only an energy burn. Worked great.
On January 25, 2010 at 8:56 pm Micki said...
I’ve found Vitamin D helps with the funk, but not with the snark. Nor with kickstarting the internal censor who is supposed to jump in when one starts to snark. Only a few more days until Groundhog’s . . . then it’s either six weeks until winter is over, or a month and half, depending on whether it sees its shadow or not.
On January 25, 2010 at 9:17 pm CrankyOtter said...
Good call. Tanning booth here I come.
On January 28, 2010 at 12:23 am Eva said...
*falls over laughing*
This is how I write at my house! (Except for the being on the phone with Daddy part)